Tuesday, November 8, 2016

November 8 meeting update

Due to some last minute complications, our meeting for tonight, November 8, will be a fellowship meeting.  We will have our Teach them Diligently Wrap-up at our December meeting.

Monday, September 26, 2016

First meeting of 2016-2017: What Am I Doing?!

We had a great first meeting of this school year.  Our topic was, "What am I doing?!" and we basically covered choosing what to do and what to let go in our homeschooling.  Contrary to some teachers, who believe that if you just follow the steps they lay out, your parenting (or homeschooling) journey will be successful, I believe that homeschooling and parenting are most successful when they are personalized.  So our meeting focused on several questions that we can ask ourselves in order to personalize our homeschooling and time priorities.

First, we asked, "Why is your family homeschooling right now?"  We may want to have more time with our children, focusing on building up strong family relations with them and between siblings.  We may want to focus on academics and providing a better education than what we had.  We may want their education to be more Biblically based or more experiential or more age-appropriate than what the public schools offer.  Our answers to this question can help us to determine which curriculum to use (if any), whether or not to join a co-op, how much time to spend on school each day, etcetera.

Secondly we asked, "How do you learn best?  How does your child learn best?"  This was a consideration of what time of day we learn best; the amount of light, space, noise, and clutter we can tolerate in our learning/work environment; if we like to be more or less scheduled; and if we are predominantly visual, auditory, or kinesthetic learners.  After considering each of these for ourselves, we need to consider whether our children are the same as we are.  If we don't know, we can start with our own preferences, but just be aware that we may need to change if we discover that our preferences aren't working for our child.

Next, we asked, "What do you hope to accomplish in your homeschooling?"  This is a consideration of long-term goals.  Whether our long-term goals include college preparation, character training, life-skills or business learning, strong family relationships, or a combination of some or all of these, there are things that we can teach our children now to set them further along the path toward these goals.  As with the first question, this question can also help us to make decisions about homeschooling direction (curriculum and like decisions).  

Similarly, we asked, "What life-skills do your kids need to know before they leave your home?  What can they learn right now?"  Nearly all children can be learning some life skill.  A young child may not be able to do laundry or cook on his own, but he can fold washcloths and help you in the kitchen.  Making it an activity that you do and enjoy together will also help shape his view of work as something that can be fun, or at the very least, can be done with a good attitude since it has to be done anyway.

Finally, we asked, "What are you willing to sacrifice for homeschooling?"  Some of us are willing to sacrifice a clean home, others healthy meals. Some are us are not willing to sacrifice either, and so choose to have a less rigorous homeschooling program.  All of us have things that we are not willing to "let go."  We need to be aware of those things.  Homeschooling does require us to sacrifice some things, and it is good to know our own limits.  However, things that ought never be sacrificed for homeschooling are our relationships with God, our husbands, or our children.  If we are sacrificing those things, we need to re-evaluate our priorities.

Thinking about each of these questions can really help shape our individual homeschools into places where our family's goals are well-thought out and achieved, where our children's individuality is honored and accepted, and where we know our own limits so that we can choose wisely when opportunities come to us.

Saturday, July 9, 2016

Suggested Reading

This summer, I happened to pick up a library book, At Home with Madame Chic: Becoming a Connoisseur of Daily Life by Jennifer L. Scott.  I was intrigued by an excerpt from the book...You may think that being chic has nothing to do with the most insignificant and mundane moments of the day.  Moments like preparing your meals, emptying the dishwasher, and paying bills. The secret is: those moments aren't insignificant.  Au Contraire.  They are very significant.  That's right; if you can change your attitude about making the pasta sauce, or choosing your clothes for the day, folding the laundry, setting the table, or dealing with the incoming mail, you can completely change your life. 

The book is not a Christian book per-se, but as I read, I realized that it emcompassed the practical application of much of what we have discussed this year from Titus 2.  For me, it especially impacted my attitude about being a keeper at home and loving my children and husband.  It also easier to be kind and to be self-controlled when my attitude is aligned with submission to God's plan for my days and not caught up in what I want for myself.

The book is a quick read.  If you struggle as I do with enjoying the mundane tasks of life and with going with the flow when your plans are interrupted, I suggest you take the time to check it out.


Monday, May 23, 2016

May 10 -- Be Submissive to Your Husband

For the last meeting of our Titus 2 study, we considered what God's command to submit to our husbands means for us.  This command is not just found in Titus 2: 4-5; it is also found in Ephesians 5:22-24, Colossians 3:18, and 1 Peter 2:23-3:2. 

First, we discussed the word "submission."  It comes from the Latin "sub" meaning "under" and "mitto, missi" meaning "to send."  So, in essence, submission is a wife choosing to "send" her desires, thoughts for how things ought to be done, etc. "under" her husband's desires and thoughts.  Of course, as with all commands from God, this needs to be done cheerfully and respectfully.

These passages teach us that the command to submit comes to us from God himself (meaning that we will be accountable to Him alone at judgement for our obedience) and that we are to submit to our own husbands about everything (unless they demand us to do something against Biblical commands).

We also noted that the greatest hindrance to our submission is not our husband's lack of leadership, desire for carnal things (like video games), or even lack of salvation.  Our greatest hindrance to obedience in this area is the same as every other area -- our desire is for our own way instead of God's way.

Luke 5:1-6 gives a great example of how we are to submit.  In this story, we see that Peter (a fisherman by profession) respectfully gives his opinion about the command that Jesus gave.  ("Master, we've worked hard all night and haven't caught anything.")  In the same way, we have insights, knowledge, or perspectives that our husbands might not have considered.  We ought to respectfully share these with them.

In Peter's story, Jesus' command does not change upon receiving Peter's information.  So Peter simply obeyed Him ("But because you say so, I will let down the nets.")  Similarly, sometimes our husbands' decisions will not change based on the information we provide.  Our response in this instance is simple -- we do what they have requested and trust God with the outcome.

There are so many blessings from submission.  First of all, our Titus 2 reading tells us that doing so will keep the word of God from being maligned.  (I hope it is acceptable for me to think in the positive -- that doing so will honor the word of God in the eyes of others.)  Submission shows the world that difference that Christ makes in the life of a woman.

There are many other blessings as well -- peace in our lives and homes (We no longer have to fight for our own way because we have already decided to give it up.), greater love and respect for our husbands, seeing our husbands become leaders, rightly reflecting the relationship between the church and God, and practicing so that submission to God is easier.


Tuesday, April 19, 2016

April 12, 2016 -- Be Kind

Lisa led us in studying the next section of Titus 2, our call to be kind/good.  (The words can be used interchangeably here.)  Lisa noted that the word here denotes an active kindness.  We need to have an attitude of kindness, but that attitude ought to come out in our actions.  She used the example of Tabitha (Dorcas) from Acts 9 to demonstrate the meaning.  Tabitha was a follower of Christ whose life was full of good works and acts of charity.

To whom are we to show kindness?  Galatians 6:10 instructs us to show kindness to the people of the church.  Proverbs 31:20 tells us to show kindness to the poor and needy.  Our enemies are to receive our kindness according to Luke 6:32-35.  Finally, and perhaps the most difficult for us sometimes,  we are to show kindness to our families.

Sometimes we are unkind to people in our family because they have hurt us, so we withdraw from them and ignore needs that they may have.  Sometimes we take our family members for granted.  Sometimes we are so caught up in the duties of keeping our homes and training our children that we forget that we ought to be doing those duties out of a heart of kindness.  Lisa reminded us of the end of our Titus 2 verses "...train the young women to...be kind...that the word of God may not be reviled."  As homeschooling moms, our family is our mission field.  We need to remember that our lack of kindness to our families, and especially our children, may eventually cause those we love to revile the word of God.  She encouraged us to be shining examples of kindness to our families who beautifully reflect the love and kindness of God (who is kind even to the unthankful and evil - Luke 6). 

At the end of the meeting, we discussed together ways that we can show kindness to our families.  Some ideas that were shared are:
1) Think about enjoying your kids.  Then it's easier to be kind to them instead of viewing them as an interruption to your day.
2) When you feel like yelling at your kids, hug them instead.
3)  Pray for God to make us kind and good.
4)  Remember that moms are the thermostats of their homes -- we set the mood.
5) Be accessible.  "Mom" is your refuge, the one who is always there.  We need our moms to take time to listen to us even as adults; our children need that, too.
6) Figure out your children's love languages and speak them.  (See The Five Love Languages of Children by Gary Chapman and Ross Campbell.)

Tuesday, March 29, 2016

March 8 -- Be Workers at Home

Jamie addressed the next topic in our Titus 2 study -- "be workers at home."  She started her presentation by assuring us that there is no checklist of things to do in order to be a good managers of our homes.  (Thank goodness!  I read a checklist for caring for your home once that included dusting your light bulbs.  According to that list, I fail everyday!)

Instead, Jamie pointed us to general truths from the Bible to help us change our mindsets about homemaking.

1) We need to develop a heart for our home.  Caring for her home should be a top priority of every woman.  (Prov. 14:1, 1 Timothy 5:14)  In Proverbs 31, we see a woman who undertook many enterprises, but her primary goal was to serve her family and her home.

2)  In caring for our homes, we need to consider what we can do to best help our husbands (Genesis 2:18-22).  Does he mind clutter?  Then we need to focus on that.  Would he consider it a help for us to mow the lawn or help with the landscaping?  Then that is what we ought to be doing.  Often, we can be distracted by taking care of what we want done in our homes rather than what our husbands and children need.

3)  Faithfulness can get boring, but that is what we are called to.  In our spiritual lives, conversion stories are so exciting and moving.  In our emotional lives, budding romances or new babies stir our hearts.  In our physical lives, moving to a new home can be like a new adventure.  However, the excitement of all of these things is short-lived.  Honestly, the vast majority of our lives are filled with the mundane "duties" that each of these entail -- cleaning that new home and making repairs to it when needed, training that precious child for many, many years without any thanks from him, loving and serving our husbands day in and day out through the years, and daily Bible reading and prayer.  These things aren't glamorous.  But God doesn't call us to be glamorous.  He calls us to be faithful (Mark 10:28-31).

4)  Finally, Jamie exhorted us to set our minds on things above (Col. 3:1-4) and to remember that God's wisdom is what we need to be building our lives on -- not on what the world says we need (1 Cor. 1:25).  She gave a quote from the Council on Biblical Manhood and Womanhood -- Fulfillment does not come through pursuing what we think will fulfill us.  Fulfillment comes through pursuing the purpose for which we have been created.  God has intended that a woman's primary sphere of influence be her home, her husband, and children. 

Saturday, January 30, 2016

January 12 meeting -- To be pure

Then they can train the younger women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their own husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God.  Titus 2:4-5

We talked about two aspects of purity in this verse.  One is the training of younger women to be pure and the other is guarding our own purity.

When talking to our daughters or other young women about purity, there are two things that need to be considered.  The most important is their attitude.  Regardless of how they dress, do they have an attitude of sensuality or one of modesty?   The second is their actual clothing.  Do they wear clothing that may be a stumbling block for young men?  Both are important in Christian purity.

We also need to keep ourselves pure.  This includes guarding against adultery by blocking from our lives any person, book, music, movie, television show, etc. that tempts us to think or behave inappropriately.  It also includes taking positive measures to treasure our marriage -- making ourselves attractive to our husbands, having a cheerful attitude, and making time for physical intimacy. 

Of course, most importantly in any battle against the flesh is reliance on the Lord.  Prayer, Bible study, and regular worship in a church body which knows you and can hold you accountable are all crucial to remaining pure in a way that will keep the word of God from being maligned.